Several ways of expressing emotions

Recognize the importance of expressing emotions.

Unexpressed emotions affect your life. For example, many people who struggle with ongoing depression or anxiety are often actually angry. Because the unexpressed anger has nowhere to go, the person experiences the emotion as depression or anxiety. If you want to take control over your emotional life, you need to first recognize that it is important to express your emotions.

Label your emotions appropriately.

Many people who have never learned how to express their emotions have a difficult time even labeling what those emotions are. Some people might feel anger when the emotion that they are actually dealing with is pain. Others might cry and feel sad in situations in which anger is really the more appropriate emotion. Practice labeling the emotion that you are actually having.

Resolve to express your emotions as you have them.

Emotions must be expressed. You can either express them as you have them or you can put a lot of energy into repressing them and just wind up having to deal with a more powerful version of your emotions later. Decide that you are going to express your emotions as you experience them.

Recognize that emotions are transient.

If you will express your emotions as you have them, they will not last. While you might feel incredibly angry at one moment, your anger will pass as long as you express it. Only repressed emotions linger for a very long time.

Express your anger physically

Anger can be a daunting emotion for many people to express. Anger is best expressed physically, especially if you have a lot of repressed anger to process. Choose a physical activity that will not harm another person or yourself. Some good ways to express anger include punching pillows, hitting the ground with a baseball bat, popping balloons, taking a kickboxing class or going for a brisk walk.

Cry out your pain.

Tears really do heal a wounded spirit. However, many people have a hard time expressing their sorrow. Try watching a sad movie and allowing yourself to cry for the characters. Set aside time to let yourself "wallow" for a little while. You will feel much better after a good cry.

Many people who suffered from trauma in childhood struggle with feelings of terror. Comfort yourself through those feelings. Visualize yourself comforting the child you once were. See yourself wrapping a thick blanket around your terrified inner child and hold that child close to your heart.

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How to wash your face the right way

Could washing your face the rightway be the secret the better skin? According to Rebecca Tung,MD, chair of dermatology at Loyola University Chicago, the simpleskin care step is more impactful than you might think."I've seenpatients with really sensitive skin who 'wash' their faces with justwater," she says. "That can lead to excess collections ofacne-causing bacteria and yeast that result in seborrhoeic dermatitis—sort oflike dandruff on your face." Here, Tung demystifies the perfect clean.

Follow these six steps.

1. Wash at least every night, if not twice a day.

"At the minimum, washing your face before you go to bed is critical," Tung says. Yes, that's even if you're not wearing a smidge of makeup. To ace face washing, suds up morning and night. And always wash or use a wipe after a workout to fend off sweat-induced breakouts.

2. Remove your makeup.

That long-wear eye makeup and foundation isn't going to come off with cleanser alone. Use an oil-based makeup remover.

3. Divide and conquer with two face washes.

Not sure how to choose the best face wash for your skin? You can't go wrong with a soap-free cleanser, which is gentle enough to use on any skin type. Wet your face, and use circular motions to massage it onto your skin. Aim for at least 30 seconds of washing to let the cleanser do its job. If you tend to break out in your T-zone or get blackheads on your nose, take care of those trouble spots with an acne treatment that contains either benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid. Those ingredients need to stay on your skin for about one minute to be effective. The truly acne prone can use a treatment wash all over, but overuse on any skin type can lead to redness and peeling.

4. Use warm to cool water.

"A lot of patients want to use hot water. They feel like they're almost giving themselves a little steam treatment, but it can be very irritating to skin," Tung says. Stick to lukewarm or cool water. Post-workout, try Tung's trick to cut down redness and flushing: Splash your face with cold water, which constricts blood vessels.

5. Consider power washing.

When it comes to getting the most intense clean, a powered cleansing tool such as TOUCHBeauty does a more thorough, uniform job of cleaning off surface dirt than your hands or even a washcloth. Need more incentive to try one? "A tool tightens pores and increases the cell turnover of your skin. It'll help reduce acne and even minimize sun damage," Tung says. Plus, seeing it on your bathroom sink is better than a sticky-note reminder screaming, "Wash your face!"

6. Gently pat dry.

You're at the finish line: Gently pat skin dry with a clean, dry face towel.

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Chinese Valentine's Day

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August 20

Raise your head on August 20 and gaze at the stars, you will find something romantic going on in the sky.

VALENTINE'S Day in China, the seventh day of the seventh lunar month, falls on August 19 this year.

That is, on Sunday evening, Niu Lang and Zhi Nu will meet on a bridge of magpies（鹊桥） across the Milky Way（银河）. Chinese grannies will remind children that they would not be able to see any magpies on that evening because all the magpies have left to form a bridge in the heavens with their wings.

Romantic legend

The legend has been handed down for nearly 2 millennia4. The story has been recorded as far back as the Jin Dynasty (256-420 AD). Poets composed hundreds of verses on the love story and many types of Chinese opera tell the story.

The Chinese people believe that the star Vega（织女星）, east of the Milky Way, is Zhi Nu and, at the constellation5 of Aquila（天鹰座）, on the western side of the Milky Way, Niu Lang waits for his wife.

Zhi Nu was said to be the youngest of seven daughters of the Queen of Heaven. With her sisters, she worked hard to weave beautiful clouds in the sky, while Niu Lang was a poor orphan6 cowherd, driven out of his home by his elder brother and his cruel wife.

Niu Lang lamented7 over his lonely and poor life with an old cow, his only friend and companion. The magical cow kindly8 told him of a way to find a beautiful and nice woman as his life companion.

Under the direction of the cow, Niu Lang went to the riverside on an evening, where the seven fairies slipped out of their heavenly palace to bathe.

He took one of the beautiful silk dresses the fairies had left on the bank. When the fairies left the water, the youngest couldn't find her clothes and had to see her sisters fly back to heaven without her.

Then Niu Lang came out with the dress and asked the youngest fairy, Zhi Nu, to stay with him.

Several years passed on Earth, which were only a few days in heaven. Niu Lang and Zhi Nu lived happily together and had two children before the Queen of Heaven discovered Zhi Nu's absence.

She was so annoyed she had Zhi Nu brought back to heaven. Seeing his beloved wife flying in the sky, Niu Lang was terrified. He caught sight of the cowhide hanging on a wall. The magical cow had told him before dying of old age: "Keep the cowhide（牛皮） for emergency use."

Putting the cowhide on, he went after his wife with his two children.

With the help of the cowhide, Niu Lang was able to follow Zhi Nu into heaven. He was about to reach his wife when the Queen showed up and pulled off her hairpin9 to draw a line between the two. The line became the Silver River in heaven, or the Milky Way.

Zhi Nu went back to the heavenly workshop, going on weaving the clouds. But she was so sad, and missed her husband across the Silver River so much that the clouds she weaved seemed sad. Finally, the Queen showed a little mercy, allowing the couple to meet once every year on the Silver River.

Well-known poem

One of the most famous poems about the legend was written by Qin Guan of in the Song Dynasty (960-1279).

Fairy Of The Magpie1 Bridge

Among the beautiful clouds,

Over the heavenly river,

Crosses the weaving maiden10.

A night of rendezvous,

Across the autumn sky.

Surpasses joy on earth.

Moments of tender love and dream,

So sad to leave the magpie bridge.

Eternal love between us two,

Shall withstand the time apart.

(Translated by Kylie Hsu)

鹊桥仙

宋·秦观

织云弄巧

飞星传恨

银汉迢迢暗度

金风玉露一相逢

便胜却人间无数

柔情似水

佳期如梦

忍顾鹊桥归路

两情若是久长时

又岂在朝朝暮暮

Compared with love stories inWestern legends, the story of Niu Lang and Zhi Nu seems not as intense or passionate11. Love doesn't kill or break up the barrier between them. They just wait patiently on the riverbank, believing that their love can withstand their time apart.

It is faith and emotional liaison12 instead of physical attraction and desire that is emphasized in the story as well as in many other Chinese folktales（民间故事） about love.

In only a few Chinese folk love stories can be found a description of the physical appearances of the hero and heroine.

In the "Butterfly Lovers", the heroine, dressed as a boy to attend school, falls in love with a classmate. After they have lived together as classmates for years, the hero did not have the slightest clue that his best friend is actually a girl!

Chinese ceremonies

The seventh day of the seventh lunar month is the only Chinese festival devoted13 to love in the Lunar calendar.

Unlike St. Valentine's Day in Western countries there is not so much emphasis on giving chocolates, flowers and kisses. Instead, Chinese girls prepare fruits, melons and incense14（熏香） as offerings to Zhi Nu, the weaving maiden, praying to acquire high skills in needlecraft（裁缝）, as well as hoping to find satisfactory husbands.

In the evening, people sit outdoors to observe the stars. Chinese grannies would say that, if you stand under a grapevine, you can probably overhear what Zhi Nu and Niu Lang are talking about.

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